About Jessica/Media Appearances – Bottomless to Sober

Bottomless to Sober

Telling a story is one of the most powerful ways in which to inspire others. I hope that this site, by telling my story and those of others, can help inspire people with various addictions change their lives. This project has been featured on NPR and Red Table Talk.

I am available for coaching services, as well as to lead professional development on wellness and as a speaker. Contact me here for more information.

My Story

Hi, I’m Jessica, and I’ve been sober since November 28, 2020.

My addiction broke me into pieces in April of 2020 after witnessing addiction transform and kill my then-boyfriend, Ian. I was triggered into an eight-month-long bender where I almost died through direct or indirect attempts at taking my own life. After many hospitalizations, seven or eight, I gave up fighting. I accepted that since God did not let me throw my life away, it was time to start picking up the pieces and making meaning of the life I have been granted because I have a gift.

I am Brooklyn born and raised. My father was a proud, incredibly beautiful, and charming Black Cuban. My mother, just as beautiful, is a tiny yet incredibly intimidating Costa Rican, making me a first-generation American. The American dream. Sure, on the outside, I was. I was bright and overcame many hurdles that young Black and Brown girls from the hood face. I shattered ceilings women in my family had not been able to, all while on the inside, I carried the weight and shame of being different, of never feeling good enough, of never feeling a part of.

I excelled with scholarships to prestigious schools. While in attendance, I had early indicators of mental health problems developing, especially bipolar disorder. Looking back, alcohol was so comforting early on because it was my psych med. Thankfully I graduated, and my career took off running, as did my addiction.

My life split itself in two, each part in a competition with the other. I was a high-achieving, award-winning teacher with one of the stronger moral compasses one may have come across. I did some solid good work for years and touched many lives, that is without a doubt. At the same time, however, my drinking was slowly consuming me. For years I was numbing myself, drinking to forget, drinking to self-medicate. Then it transformed into drinking because I couldn’t stop. The pain of past traumas, constant lies, car wrecks, divorce, hangovers, lost homes, significant injuries, abuse, isolation, hospital visits, rehabs, hallucinations, anxiety, fires, and rapidly declining physical health—I juggled it all. I was all things to all people but myself. The safety of my classroom protected me and kept me steady. It was the one place where no matter what happened outside in the world, I was safe. My students were safe.

Eventually, the alcohol stopped working, the classroom could not keep me safe either.

I was dying but couldn’t die.

I also couldn’t live how I was living, suffering and refusing help. Exhausted, I surrendered and cast everything off of me.

I started a new life. They say it’s about changing people, places, and things, and that is what I did—new city, new work, and now with family. The pieces are coming back together; I’m no longer alone and want others to know they are not alone either.

Qualifications:

Certified through the ICF Accredited Coaching Program at the Certified Life Coaching Institute. Peer Recovery Support Specialist, registered with The National Association for Addiction Professionals (NAADAC), which provides continuing education for members.

Outside of recovery, I have a masters in special education as well as an educational specialist degree in instructional leadership.

Book a free consultation here.

Media Appearances

Written Work (Outside of the Bottomless to Sober Blog)