Is my job really not for me, or is it something else?
Maybe you’ve decided to change your relationship with alcohol. Whether you’re quitting or cutting back, the increased clarity of being less drunk leaves you questioning several things in your life.
In support group meetings that I facilitate, I often quote from Dr. Nicole LePera, known on social media as The Holistic Psychologist, because she always seems to be on point.
Last night in a meeting I ran, I posed the question based on this Tweet of hers where she says that we start to wake up upon entering a healing journey. She wrote:
The question I asked of the group was, “Since starting the work of changing your relationship with alcohol, what have you had to examine from this list. What do you need to examine?”
The responses varied, but later on, I had a coaching session with a client about this topic, specifically looking at our work and how it impacts us. Since getting sober, this client questions if her job is a good fit for her and has started to wonder if she’s even qualified to do it.
“I don’t know that I’m equipped for this.”
I paused, then asked, “Is it that you’re not qualified to do your job, or do we have some digging to do?” And we got to work.
If you’re having the same doubts as you start to examine your work while you’re on your recovery journey, I recommend the following:
- List your job requirements. What skills does it require to be completed successfully?
- Then, without any positive or negative emotions, neutrally list the facts. What are YOUR skills and qualifications? Compare what you offer to the list of job requirements. (My wild guess is that If your employer hired you, you are more than likely qualified unless you lied on your resume and interview, then that’s a whole other story.)
- If you ARE qualified, but you’re still having some mixed feelings about your work, ask yourself, is this something that I really WANT to do? Does this sit right in my spirit? Just because you’re qualified to do something does not mean you have to do it.
- If you find that, factually speaking, you are not qualified, is this something you want to grow toward getting better at? What supports do you need, and where can you get them? Schedule that meeting, send that email, or make that phone call.
- If you decide what you’re doing for a living right now isn’t right for you, what’s next?
Being on the spectrum of alcohol misuse and abuse, then working to recover from it, can have us believing incredibly negative things about ourselves. These beliefs can sneakily seep into all areas of our lives. Stepping back and examining our beliefs around our work can bring much needed clarity as you move through your own healing journey.
Please don’t hesitate to reach out and schedule a free consultation for coaching services if you want support on your own journey.
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